Calories, Sizes & Followers – How I’m Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

Calories, Sizes & Followers – How I’m Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

Clothing sizes, social media followers, calories, steps – my life at the moment seems to revolve around numbers. Calculating calories, counting the number of steps I’ve taken and watching my social following are all just a part of an average day. But what happens when a norm turns into an obsession? Becoming obsessive with numbers, for me, can be rather dangerous and can lead to a lot of guilt and negativity, which is what I’ve been feeling these past couple of weeks. This is why I’ve decided to shake things up. My plan? Ditch the numbers, or at least try my best to not focus on them.

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

I knew I had to do something when I started fixating on my weight, which is something I haven’t done since I was a teenager. I have a balanced diet and I exercise regularly, but I’ve realised my body has changed. I’m no longer my 18-year-old self, who was a size six and could eat anything I wanted. No. I’m a woman now (god that makes me sound so old) and my body is totally different. In addition to the curves I now have, I’ve put on a little weight. Since moving out my diet and eating habits have completely changed, which has resulted in me putting on a few pounds and not being able to fit into my clothes comfortably. It’s obviously not the end of the world, but I’m not happy about it and for weeks now I’ve been obsessing with what size clothes I fit into.

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

What we think about our bodies and the way we feel about them is so personal. It’s one of those things where no matter what others tell you, your own opinions will always remain supreme. Instead of setting unrealistic goals of losing a silly amount of weight, I’m doing my best to ignore what the labels say and focus on how I feel in the the clothes. Confidence isn’t measured in numbers, but the emotions we feel when we’re happy and comfortable in ourselves. This is what I’m trying to focus on.

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

Following on from my weight and clothing sizes is exercise. Does anyone else feel guilty when they miss a workout, or don’t hit their calorie burn for the day? I do. Don’t get me wrong I love my Fitbit and think it’s an excellence way of tracking and improving my health, but I’ve found if I don’t reach my daily goals I get this overwhelming feeling that I’ve let myself down.

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

When I scroll through my tracking if I don’t see green ticks against my calories and steps, I somehow feel terrible about myself. I stress about gaining weight and suddenly hate what I see in the mirror just because I didn’t reach a certain number. It’s weird how gulit and negative thoughts can make you feel. So, instead of fixating on numbers and letting them define my workout, I’ve ditched by Fitbit and I’m going to listen to my body instead. I’m going to lift weights until my body aches, run until I can’t run anymore, and let me body tell me when my workout is finished.

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

Now, I know I’m not the only one who’s follower counting these days. Watching my followers on Instagram is probably the biggest obsession I have with numbers at the moment. It’s frustrating, annoying and can be a little toxic if you’re in the wrong frame of mind. It’s so hard not to compare yourself to others on Instagram and on the days where you gain a follower and lose six you ask yourself what the hell you’re doing wrong? I didn’t join Instagram to have loads of followers, I joined for the fun of it, so that’s what I plan to do. I plan to fuck the numbers and inject some fun back into posting. Capturing images that retain fun memories and sharing them is what Insta is all about, and what’s the point in doing something if it’s not fun? So, I’m focusing on just having fun with it again and stop taking it so seriously, while trying to build a strong sense of self, so that I don’t compare myself to others in the future.

Do you have an obsession with numbers? What do you obsess about?

Sarah Jayne x

How I'm Overcoming My Obsession With Numbers

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9 Comments

  1. May 25, 2018 / 4:58 am

    Such a brilliant post! We’re definitely all guilty of number counting at times, a few years ago this was me!I used to look at the calories of the naughty things I’d eaten and then made sure I burned off the same amount in the gym and would only buy clothes in a size 10 or 12 and would never get a 14 even if it fit better ! Definitely not a healthy way to live!

    I try very hard now not to let the numbers bother me! I’ll pick up clothes in a shop and judge whether they’ll fit me based on their style and size rather than the label attached to them!

    …. watching my numbers on Instagram though? That’s a whole different thing!

    • May 30, 2018 / 6:27 pm

      I know, counting numbers on Instagram is something I think all us bloggers struggle with and it’s definitely the hardest one to try and give up! xx

  2. May 30, 2018 / 9:19 am

    It’s so true – i stress about numbers so much! it’s difficult to get out of the habit when you’re in it!

  3. May 30, 2018 / 11:03 am

    This post is speaking to my soul. All I think about is calories, how many I’ve had, how many I shouldn’t. Numbers for my blog etc it’s a nightmare. I’m going to take a leaf out of your book’

  4. May 31, 2018 / 7:08 am

    I found I was getting obsessed with my social media numbers and it was really dragging me down so I had to take a step back for a while – which helped x

  5. May 31, 2018 / 7:08 pm

    I definitely have an obsession with numbers. I’ve put on weight over the past few years and find myself obsessing over both my clothes size and calories. Plus don’t even get me started on Instagram!! I know I’m only losing people who followed me for a follow in the first place but it’s so frustrating and I’m not even 100% sure why I care so much! x

  6. June 3, 2018 / 3:02 pm

    This post will help so many people! I try to remain oblivious to numbers if I’m honest and I tend to be happier that way, it’s good that you recognize yourself doing it so you stop.
    Alicia Xo

  7. June 7, 2018 / 12:12 pm

    I’m trying to give up count all numbers especially involving calories and Instagram, neither is exactly healthy to constantly worry about and it can really put a downer on your mood when you don’t hit a target.
    Alicia x
    http://www.aestheticobsessed.co.uk

  8. June 15, 2018 / 9:49 pm

    This post is so good and I’m so guilty of being obsessed by numbers (my weight being the worst one) I know being so *aarrrgh* about my weight and the number on the scales does me more harm than good but I can’t seem to break that NEED to weigh myself, compare, measure my waist and crap like that. It’s tough isn’t it?

    Katie x
    http://www.katie-middleton.co.uk

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